Enter into his gates with thanksgiving, and into his courts with praise: be thankful unto him, and bless his name. Psalm 100:4

Have you entered into the Lord’s gates today? One of our men preached the morning service yesterday and he preached on our covenant with God. It got me to thinking how blessed we are that Christ’s death and resurrection created a covenant for us with the Father – for all born again believers! What a joy to meditate on that today. So today, I want to encourage each of you toward righteousness.

We do not need to be defeated Christians. We do not need to give in to temptation. We just need to be hard workers at our faith in our precious Saviour. I’m sure many a lady gives it her “all” when it comes to caring for her husband, her family, her home, etc. We can’t stop there … we need to care for our spiritual lives with just as much zeal and effort. Yes, cleaning the bathroom and doing laundry is a chore. I just don’t get that same effervescent feeling the lady in the commercial gets about my scrubbing bubbles cleaning my toilet, ya know? It’s WORK to get these chores done – but the feeling of satisfaction afterwards is priceless!

Making sure that we cover all the areas of our spiritual lives is work also. But this “work” has eternal results. The work in our homes is temporary – the dust will always come back and there will always be dishes and laundry to do. But the work we do for the Lord is forever. I think of Christ’s account of Mary and Martha. He did not use a parable here but referred to actual women. The Lord placed this account in His Word especially for us! Mary spent her time at His feet while Martha carried on with the chores. Mary gleaned from the Master while Martha missed out on His blessings from the Word.

Working at our spiritual lives is just that – WORK! Here is a little something that helps me strive in this area of training myself and I want to share it with you.

W – Wake up with the Lord with song! Sing your favorite hymn – you know the one – it just speaks to your heart and gets you in the right mood – Mine is “Amazing Grace”

O – Open my heart to Him in prayer. I believe in making my heart right with God before praying for others. I confess my sins, I love on Him real good and then I pray for others.
I have a prayer list – in fact, I’m making a prayer journal to start using – and I keep this list with my Bible – the list is so long but I’ve broken it down by days so each day has a different grouping of people (i.e. Sunday = church family; Monday = missionaries; etc. I record specific details for each of these people so I’m praying for specific needs, not generalities.

R – Read His Word! Reading God’s Word is a learned trait. Don’t be so stringent that you don’t enjoy His Word. I have three separate times for reading.

  1. The first is my sweet time with Him. Today is Dec. 11th so I read my Proverb of the day (there are conveniently 31 Proverbs, one each for the 31 days in the month). I then read my Psalms for the day (I read Psalm 11 (then add 30), Psalm 41, Psalm 71, Psalm 101, and Psalm 131. I then read the 11th division or section of Psalm 119. This method for reading Psalms enables me to read the entire Book of Psalms every month. I then read Acts chapter 11 so I can learn about the church’s history. And finally, I read Revelations chapter 11 because we are promised a blessing in Rev. 1:3 if we read and understand this book.
  2. The second time for reading is reading through the Bible – I usually do this before bed. I
    have never been able to completely read the Bible through using a yearly plan but at least I am reading through. Sometimes we set goals that we just can’t keep and then we feel defeated and give up totally. I would rather keep at it and be blessed then to give up.
  3. My third reading comes with studying God’s Word. We’re commanded to study to show ourselves approved UNTO GOD Not to show off our knowledge to others, not to puff ourselves up thinking we’re better than others – but approved UNTO GOD. This is where we dive into meaty things and learn – not learning from someone else’s studying but learning for ourselves. You may have your own method of reading – I hope you do. In my 26 years of salvation, all the women that I’ve come in contact with who have struggled spiritually, struggled because they were not in the Word for themselves. When we stand before the Lord and give Him the reason why we didn’t do this or didn’t do that, our excuse that the preacher never taught us won’t hold water. We are commanded to study for ourselves.

K – Keep Him in the forefront of my mind all day. When we have sung, prayed and read, it’s pretty hard to forget the God you started your day with.

I use to have my time with Him at night because my children were early risers and I ran from the time they woke up till it was time for their bedtime. However, I found that I did not get the fuel and spiritual energizing I so needed to make it through the day. It took hard work to get up in the wee hours to have my time with the Lord. I was not always faithful but I kept at it.

Of course, we women have different routines and whatever works best for you is what you should be faithful in. If you have little ones at home, don’t despair. Your time will come where you will have all the time you need in the mornings. Maybe your time is nap time or after their bed time. If you don’t have a special time, resolve to yourself to make one. If you want to succeed at this, hold yourself accountable to someone. Ask a good friend to ask you daily if you spent your time with the Lord. One who won’t take excuses but will lovingly tell you that your excuse is not a good one!

Dear God…
Help me to be like Mary
As I start this day, oh Lord
Mindful of the things I’ve gleaned
From Your Holy Word!

Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion hath light with darkness? 15 And what concord hath Christ with Belial? or what part hath he that believeth with an infidel? 16 And what agreement hath the temple of God with idols? for ye are the temple of the living God; as God hath said, I will dwell in them, and walk in them; and I will be their God, and they shall be my people. 17 Wherefore come out from among them, and be ye separate, saith the Lord, and touch not the unclean thing; and I will receive you, 18 And will be a Father unto you, and ye shall be my sons and daughters, saith the Lord Almighty. 2 Cor 6:14-18 (KJV)

Unequally yoked … just what does that mean? Read today’s text and see what we can pick apart. Do you know what a yoke is? This is a picture of a yoke – you can see two openings, one for each oxen. Now picture two oxen in this yoke and how these two oxen would go about their daily routine. Now ask yourself these questions:

  1. Can the two walk in opposite directions?
  2. IF they did walk in opposite directions, what would happen?
  3. Do you think the oxen would get into a battle?
  4. Do you think they would experience pain around their necks from the struggling?

I absolutely love the word of God! There are spiritual applications in everything we read, amen? So let’s look at this spiritual application.

Can an unsaved man and a saved woman walk in opposite directions? The oxen cannot, therefore, neither can man and wife. A man and wife are “one.” How can “one” go in two different directions? The wife will be coaxed in the husband’s direction, and vice versa.  This is a very difficult situation to be in. This is why we are warned of this in 2 Corinthians 6:14.

There is nothing but heartache for an unequally yoked couple who knowingly goes into a marriage. Starting a marriage in direct disobedience to God will certainly bring its share of chastisement. It won’t help if you knowingly go into an unequally yoked marriage and then attend church faithfully. (1 Sam 15:22) Obedience to God’s will is what He expects. Like any good father, the Lord will “spank” His child. (Prov. 13:24)

It is better to end an unequally yoked relationship before it gets too serious. I know many will not like reading this. They’re thinking to themselves, “But I can win my future spouse to the Lord!” You can’t know that for certain! Life with an unbeliever is extremely difficult. Read the rest of today’s text! You have the Holy Spirit and the spouse has the spirit of his father the devil! If you knowingly go into this relationship, you will be struggling daily! I assure you!

I know because I am in an unequally yoked marriage. I repented and accepted Christ as my Saviour after I was married so I was not disobedient when I got married because neither of us was saved. However, I want to use this opportunity to encourage a Christian out there to stop before you get yourself into a life time of difficulties! I have been married 37 years now and my husband is still not saved. I pray every day that he will come to know the Lord Jesus Christ.

Just like today’s picture of the yoke, a husband and wife cannot walk in two separation directions without pain. There will be battles and there will be conflicts. Don’t do it, Christian! Marriage is a wonderful institution and can be wonderful when the husband and wife are both saved. But when one is not, it is a constant battle between right and wrong! Heed my warning, I beg of you!

~2 Corinthians 6:14 Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion hath light with darkness?

Where does your day-to-day life lie? Do you mainly fellowship with unbelievers? I have heard some say that this is where we must be to spread the Gospel. Well, yes, the Gospel needs to be preached but it does not mean that your life should be spent totally around unbelievers. Otherwise this verse would be in vain. Paul was explaining to us that if we are yoked with unbelievers, we find ourselves (those with the light of the Gospel) having fellowship with darkness (the unsaved).

It is safe to conclude that when a believer is surrounded by unbelievers, he will struggle in his spiritual walk and will fall over and over. Any believer can tell you this. It is best to surround yourself with people of like mind so you may be encouraged to do right. Spurgeon said it right in the quote below. The unbelieving world will not help draw out truth in our hearts. Instead, they will keep us in darkness. This is not the place for a believer to be.

“Our own hearts are deceitful, so that truth lies not on the surface, but must be drawn up from the deepest well.”
Charles Haddon Spurgeon

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1 Peter 3:6 Even as Sara obeyed Abraham, calling him lord: whose daughters ye are, as long as ye do well, and are not afraid with any amazement.

Let’s take a look at verse 6 today. Do you look at submission to your husband as a curse instead of a blessing? It is only by being in submission that a woman is under her husband’s spiritual covering and protection, whether he is saved or not. Remember, these verses were written by Peter to women whose husbands were disobedient to the Word. When you submit to your husband, the burden of responsibility rests upon your husband, not you. He is the head of your household and he will be held accountable for the way he leads his household. A good analogy is to look at our military. Each leader is held accountable for his men. Whether it is the General, a Captain, a Major, Sergeant or Corporal. If his men fail, he is held accountable. Throughout history, leadership was held accountable for the well-being of the people serving under them. God designed leadership and it began with the home in the Garden of Eden. From the beginning, man was created to rule over his wife and his home. God stated, and thy desire shall be to thy husband, and he shall rule over thee. (Gen 3:16b)

Peter not only says to submit, but he also says to honor your husband just as Sara did. “Sara obeyed Abraham, calling him lord.” Calling her husband “lord” was the custom of the day. But the Word of God is LIVING and I believe that it is meant for us women today. John 4:10 refers to Jesus as the Living Water. His Word lives and cleanses us. I don’t believe God means for us to call our husbands “lord,” but I do believe we should speak to and about our husbands with honor and with respect! She called him lord not out of fear, or requirement, but out of honor. Your husband may be a nasty man, but his office of husband deserves respect and honor. You may not agree with the President of the United States 100% of the time, but you respect the office, don’t you? You were never called to be a helpmeet to the President but you have been called to be a helpmeet to your husband. You were called to reverence your husband in Eph. 5:33.

What ways can you honor your husband? When you are with other women, are you quick to point out his deficiencies? Or do only good things come out of your mouth about your dear husband. Even if you can’t think of a thing good about your unsaved husband, surely there was a reason you fell in love with him in the first place. Think on these things. Encourage yourself. Follow the principles in Phil. 4:8. How do you greet your husband when he walks through the door at the end of the day? Are you pleasant toward him or are you busy complaining about how your day went?

Do you nag him about those little jobs that need to be done around the house? My husband and I came up with a “job jar” (many call it the “honey-do” list). Every time I had a chore that needed attention, I would write it on a slip of paper and put it in the job jar. My husband would go into his job jar when he had some free time and pull out a task. Some times he would put it back because it would take more time than he had available just then. If he didn’t pick anything from the job jar, the pieces of paper were constantly a reminder to him that chores needed to be done. I never had to nag him or remind him. He had eyes and could see for himself. Those little pieces of paper were doing the job for me 🙂

Dear lady, you can make or break your husband and your marriage. If you tear down your husband, you tear down your home. Through wisdom is an house builded; and by understanding it is established: (Pro 24:3) A wise woman will learn what God’s Word says about being a helpmeet to the man God has given to her, whether saved or not – the Word has no stipulations. She will search the Scriptures to learn how she can be the kind of wife that Sarah was to Abraham. Peter said that we do well to be like Sarah because we are her daughters.

Learn from Sarah. She honored Abraham. She recognized that he was the head of her house and she submitted to her husband. How else could he have asked her to pack what she had and move to an undisclosed location for an undisclosed period of time? Would you be so willing? What a loving and submissive wife. She placed her future and care into the hands of her husband. She trusted God so much that she knew in her heart that she would be O.K. This means that she loved her God and walked with Him. We are to do the same just as we submit to the Lord, Jesus Christ. Just because your husband is not saved or is disobedient to the Word, does not mean that you are exempt from this verse. There are no “but’s or however’s or except’s” in this verse.

When a man receives honor from his chaste and submissive wife, it is a perfect testimony to him of Jesus Christ. The backslidden man won’t need a word said to him – he will see his wife’s “living testimony” and will be convicted by the Holy Spirit. These actions by you prepares your husband’s heart to accept the Holy Spirit’s work. If you go against the will of God, your husband’s heart will harden. However, if you obey God’s Word and learn to submit to your husband, his heart will become tender. The unsaved man will be drawn by his wife’s testimony. It will speak to his heart and challenge him toward seeking salvation. Remember, he is in a much better position to hear and see the Gospel of Jesus Christ at work than the unsaved man whose wife is not saved either. For the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the husband: else were your children unclean; but now are they holy. (1Co 7:14) What kind of testimony are you portraying?

I remember being worried about what I would do if my husband commanded me to sin. I did not want to sin against God but I also didn’t want to be placed in a situation where it was me against my husband. I prayed and prayed over this and the Lord never allowed me to go through this without giving me a godly way out – in fact, the Lord provided the perfect solution each time which did not offend my husband or throw “religion” in his face. I believe that God provides every wife of an unsaved man with extra grace so she can be a testimony to her God without dishonoring her husband. God never let me down in this area and I believe this is what Peter is speaking about. I did not need to be afraid of what my unsaved husband would ask me to do because my faith in my Heavenly Father was such that I could trust my husband in His care and He would guide and direct me.

Granted there may be some of you out there whose husbands are abusive. You cannot be a submissive wife if you are a dead wife. You must leave with full knowledge that the separation is temporary, until he has sought counselling and will no longer be abusive. Seek counselling from your Pastor and work toward reconciliation with your husband. Once your husband has done so and the doors are opened for you to reunite, go back and be the helpmeet God created you to be. Art thou bound unto a wife? seek not to be loosed. Art thou loosed from a wife? seek not a wife. (1Co 7:27) This pertains to the wife as well. Always seek to reconcile. After all, Christ came to reconcile all of us to the Father. Will you remember those bad days? More than likely. Should you hold it against your husband? No. Forgive him and let it go. The devil will want to use that against you and will work hard at stirring your anger. A close walk with the Lord is crucial every time your thoughts go astray. For if ye forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you: (Mat 6:14) But if ye forgive not men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses. (Mat 6:15)

Instead of asking all those “what if” questions, dear lady, pray and give those questions to the Lord. Rest in His care. I can remember reading Psalm 121 over and over when I had fears. My wonderful Shepherd gave me much comfort in those verses and I would walk away refreshed yet again. Won’t you let your fears rest at the Saviour’s feet and just love and submit to your unsaved husband as God would have you to do? There can be peace for the wife of an unbelieving or disobedient husband. Ours is an easy task – we’re called to be submissive whether or not they are saved. There are no qualifiers and no exceptions. All women are to be submissive to their own husband. The key is to be obedient to that calling and to learn all you can about it through the Word of God.

Even during my worst trial as the wife of an unbelieving husband, I had hope because my Heavenly Father gave me hugs through His Word. Yes, there was also a good friend and good preaching to glean from. But God’s Word is what heals and God’s Word is what refreshes, my friend. When you feel downhearted and need encouragement, get that help from the Lord. Read Psalm 121 today and you will see why I exhort you in this way.

Kate Plourde

Dear God…
Help me to be in the Word
Where all Your truth is revealed
Let my heart be close to You, Lord
I beg You my marriage to heal

1 Pet. 3:1-6 (1) Likewise, ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands; that, if any obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by the conversation of the wives; (2) While they behold your chaste conversation coupled with fear. (3) Whose adorning let it not be that outward adorning of plaiting the hair, and of wearing of gold, or of putting on of apparel; (4) But let it be the hidden man of the heart, in that which is not corruptible, even the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price. (5) For after this manner in the old time the holy women also, who trusted in God, adorned themselves, being in subjection unto their own husbands: (6) Even as Sara obeyed Abraham, calling him lord: whose daughters ye are, as long as ye do well, and are not afraid with any amazement.

Verses 3 and 4 elaborate on what Peter was emphasizing in verse 2. This Victorian lady in the picture looks beautiful, doesn’t she? Her dress is lovely and her hair is just right. She seems so peaceful sitting there reading. However, that does not make her godly, does it? Peter is not saying that we shouldn’t look nice, but that we should be just as nice looking on the inside. The wife of an unbelieving husband must have a heart right with God. She also must have a meek and quiet spirit, which Peter says is of great value in the eyes of God! Don’t you want to be regarded as a woman of great value in the eyes of God? I know I do.

Noah Webster defines meek as:

1. Mild of temper; soft; gentle; not easily provoked or irritated; yielding; given to forbearance under injuries

It helps me to understand a passage like this more clearly if I think of the opposites of the definition. For example, if a meek wife is of great value in God’s eyes, then the opposite of that meek wife would not be of great value. That woman who have a temper, be harsh, loud and unkind, easily agitated, not submissive, and intolerant of incompetence. Are you like this woman of no value to the Lord? Your husband will not be get saved if you are not practicing a meek spirit.

Verse 4 also says she has a quiet spirit. I simply love Noah’s definition of quiet in this verse.

3. Peaceable; not turbulent; not giving offense; not exciting controversy, disorder or trouble; mild; meek; contented.

I love looking up what the meaning of a word had back in the times that our blessed King James Bible was written. Today’s definitions are so diluted and the word quiet no longer means this so today’s woman does not get the full blessing that comes with this verse. Can you imagine the unbelieving man who has a wife who has these qualifications?

  1. Mild tempered
  2. Soft (submissive)
  3. Gentle (not loud or unkind)
  4. Not easily provoked or irritated
  5. Yielding (again submissive)
  6. Patient and forgiving to those who hurt her
  7. Peaceable
  8. Not turbulent (stirring up strife)
  9. Not giving offense
  10. Not exciting controversy, disorder or trouble
  11. Meek
  12. Contented

These qualities are the product of a born-again woman desiring with all her heart to see her husband saved. She will go great lengths to allow the Holy Spirit to work in her heart so that she meets these standards set out in 1 Peter 3:3-4. A woman who is this valuable in God’s eyes will be shining with the love of Christ in all areas of her life. How can her husband help but see her Jesus through her?

Do you not see, dear sister, that when we are in God’s perfect will, He can and will do a mighty work in your lost or backslidden husband’s life? What is God’s perfect will? He created you to be a helpmeet. Learn and practice all you can in this wonderful role God has given you. You will reap the blessings.

Dear God…
How deficient I have been
In some areas of my life
I want to be of value
To him and in Your sight!

1 Pet. 3:1-6 (1) Likewise, ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands; that, if any obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by the conversation of the wives; (2) While they behold your chaste conversation coupled with fear. (3) Whose adorning let it not be that outward adorning of plaiting the hair, and of wearing of gold, or of putting on of apparel; (4) But let it be the hidden man of the heart, in that which is not corruptible, even the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price. (5) For after this manner in the old time the holy women also, who trusted in God, adorned themselves, being in subjection unto their own husbands: (6) Even as Sara obeyed Abraham, calling him lord: whose daughters ye are, as long as ye do well, and are not afraid with any amazement.

Let’s move on to verse 2 today. (2) While they behold your chaste conversation coupled with fear. Ah, chaste conversation. So what does chaste really mean? God’s Word has not changed and the definition of chaste 2000 years ago still means the same today. Noah Webster defines chaste as:

(2) Free from obscenity. While they behold your chaste conversation. 1 Pet 3. (3) In language, pure; genuine; uncorrupt; free from barbarous words and phrases, and from quaint, affected, extravagant expressions.

To be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed. (Tit 2:5) The older women were commanded to teach the younger women to be chaste so that the word of God would not be blasphemed. This chaste woman is not only chaste in word but in deed also.

When a woman is not chaste in conversation, she is said to blaspheme God’s Word. What do you consider chaste conversation then? What is so important about a woman’s words that she should be on the alert? We all know what it means to blaspheme. Peter says that if we do not practice chaste conversation, we are blaspheming God’s Word. We are cursing the God’s power in our husband’s lives, ladies! Our unchaste behavior and words will be like stench to your husband’s nostrils. He will despise God even more. You have quite a heavy responsibility, dear lady. I personally cannot believe that a woman would actually speak to her unsaved husband (or disobedient husband) in such a way as to blaspheme God’s Word. If a Christian woman is doing this to her unsaved husband, how in the world will that lead him to Christ? Your dear husband has a better chance of getting saved because you are saved than the unsaved household. For the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife,… (1 Cor. 7:14a) He is set apart in God’s eyes because of you. Surely you don’t want to be the cause of God’s Word to be blasphemed in his mind.

Notice Peter also says that her chaste conversation is coupled with fear. God will allow trials to come her way due to her mouth that she would not have experienced had she practiced chaste conversation. There will be problems in her life which she will probably blame on her husband rather than look to her spiritual walk. Many pitfalls are due to the wife not exercising her responsibility of practicing chaste conversation.

It’s so important that unsaved husbands or disobedient Christian men see the Lord working in their wives’ life. Husbands need to see God’s Goodness at work. Ye are the salt of the earth: but if the salt have lost his savour, wherewith shall it be salted? it is thenceforth good for nothing, but to be cast out, and to be trodden under foot of men. (Mat 5:13) Dear lady, your conversation to your husband should be making him thirsty for the Lord. Not by quoting Bible verses but by your sweetness and by your actions toward him. Your love for Christ should be such that it spills over onto your husband.

Does your world revolve around this man God has given to you? Do you strive to please him and do those little things that he loves? Do you still see your husband in those same girlish eyes you saw him while you were dating? Do you still laugh at his corny jokes? Or do you treat him differently because he’s not saved or he’s disobedient? Ladies, what is in our hearts will come out of our mouths. But those things which proceed out of the mouth come forth from the heart; and they defile the man. (Mat 15:18) What we feel in our hearts about our husbands will show up in our words and in our actions toward them. You must remember that the woman he married has changed drastically. She is not the cursing, drinking, worldly woman he was use to. He now has a different woman and it’s like Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde to him. You’ve made a transformation that he did not authorize so he’s feeling threatened and confused, I’m sure.

Your husband will only accept this new you if you treat him the way Christ would treat him. What would the Lord say and do? Christ submitted to the Father’s will to the point of dying on the cross for us. Are you submitting to your husband in the same manner? We’ll cover delicate issues on another day but in the mean time, you were not created to be his helpmeet only when he is a good Christian husband. Peter is clear and deliberately directs verses 1-6 to the woman whose husband is not saved or has a backslidden husband. It’s so much more important for the wife of such a man to be in close fellowship with her God. Only through Him and His Word can this wife love her man unconditionally with that same “agape” love the Lord has for us.

What’s the best thing a wife of such a man can do? She should pray for her husband because this is her power; ask for God’s wisdom in dealing with every situation because this is her ammunition; be faithful in her Bible reading because this is her strength. Don’t let up! Don’t give up! Be faithful! Be strong in the Lord. Finally, my brethren, be strong in the Lord, and in the power of his might. (Eph 6:10) It is the Holy Spirit who will draw your husband to Christ. Let the Holy Spirit do His job. Get busy doing your job as his helpmeet and leave the rest to God.

Dear God…
Help each lady here today
Be chaste in word and deed
So her man can find You
And recognize his need.

1 Pet. 3:1-6 (1) Likewise, ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands; that, if any obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by the conversation of the wives; (2) While they behold your chaste conversation coupled with fear. (3) Whose adorning let it not be that outward adorning of plaiting the hair, and of wearing of gold, or of putting on of apparel; (4) But let it be the hidden man of the heart, in that which is not corruptible, even the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price. (5) For after this manner in the old time the holy women also, who trusted in God, adorned themselves, being in subjection unto their own husbands: (6) Even as Sara obeyed Abraham, calling him lord: whose daughters ye are, as long as ye do well, and are not afraid with any amazement.

The best place to go when you want to learn what God requires of us is to go to His Word. The wife of the husband who is disobedient to the word does not only refer to the unsaved man, but to a backslidden one as well. How many Christian men do you know that are 100% obedient to the Word of God? I am certain that many are striving to be obedient, but are they 100% obedient? This verse applies to all men, therefore 1 Peter 3:1-6 applies to all wives.

We will cover one verse today. Verse 1 says that we are to be in subjection to our own husbands. Can you imagine the chaos in a home if the wife were to be in subjection to her father as well as her husband? What if they disagreed? Can you see where it would get messy? God wants us to answer to one man once we are married, and that man is our dear husband!

Subjection means to be under the power, control and authority of your husband. I think of a king and his subjects. The subjects obey the king’s commands. They don’t disobey because they think their way is better. They do what they are asked to do. A wife is not a slave because the Word says that we are all equal in Christ. There is neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither bond nor free, there is neither male nor female: for ye are all one in Christ Jesus. (Gal. 3:28) However, the Word is very clear to say that the wife must be in subjection to her own husband. Just because we are free in Christ does not mean that we can remove the responsibility of being subject to our husbands.

Verse 1 also goes on to say that if any husband does not obey the word, they can be convicted and won by her conversation. What would a wife’s conversation have to be like? Without the word, verse 1 continues to say – meaning quotes Scriptures to him in the guise of trying to “help him.” He is the head of the house, yet the help meet is instructing him. The best thing a saved wife can do for her disobedient husband is to pray for him diligently. Ask the Lord to work through your husband for your benefit. For the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the husband: else were your children unclean; but now are they holy. (1 Cor. 7:14) This verse does not say that your husband is saved because you are saved. It says that your husband is sanctified because you are saved. Your husband is “set apart” and given special privileges because of his saved wife. He benefits from God’s Goodness to her and her family. He receives opportunities to hear the gospel through her actions.

What is your conversation like toward your husband? Do your words prove to your him that you love him and are dedicated to him? Or are they nagging words, constantly trying to be his personal “holy spirit.” Remember, none of us are without sin and do not even remotely come close to being like the true Holy Spirit. Let Him do His work in your husband. Only then will it be lasting.

If you are in doubt as to whether or not you should say something to your husband, stop, read the Word and pray about it first. If you’re still in doubt, don’t say it. God is not the author of confusion and He would definitely give you the wisdom you need when you ask Him for it. If any of you lack wisdom, let him ask of God, that giveth to all men liberally, and upbraideth not; and it shall be given him. (Jam. 1:5) I truly believe that the Lord will equip us to do a job that He has called us to do. God has called you and I to be an help meet to our husbands. Therefore, He will equip us – all we have to do is ask Him what His will is.

Dear God…
Please give me wisdom with each day
To be what You’d have me to be
A godly help meet to my mate
So through me Your face he’ll see